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Friday, August 11, 2006/ 9:56 PM A 'not expected' day some of you might probably know what my post today shall be. but first, let's start with what happened at the beginning of the day. like the what people always say 'start with a and end with z'. there's school today which is the last day of the week. well, i actually don't feel like coming to school as it was nice resting for a week without any restriction. but due to the fact that there are necessary appointments to meet in school, i have no other alternatives. started of with quite a good start as we have c.m.e lesson. i didn't pay much attention to mrs wee. daydreaming, talking, sleeping was what i did. xD. too lazy to listen about parliamentary stuff. anyway english was next and oh my god. mr ang reminded us of when our final o'level oral examination will take place. feeling of intensity and nervousness was already there, but i didn't feel it that much at this point of moment. we'll see how when the examination draws nearer. mr tham took over and well, he explained to us what we should and should not do when proceeding with the oral. he gave us some pointers and i think it helps in a way. he talks about the examiner and he truthfully told us that the examiner was his reject. we were like laughing out loud. then it was chemistry. we did practical. nothing much. time flies fast. after recess was our mother tounge o'level results. alwin and i was sitting outside the general office, nervous of what might happen next. his hands were extremely cold and he was like so-called-trembling. but not until so obvious. anyway we waited for 30 mins to pass by and it was nerve-wrecking. i tell you; i'd rather go back to class then to take the results. then the bell rang. alwin and i were like. okay. here we go. all the best. may god bless you. we proceeded to the hall. of course, before we're in a world of our own; shouting and screaming on our results, mrs leong lectured us our percentage passes and overall performance. her speech was exceptionally long and i reckoned it might be on purpose. haa. overall, everyone passed with at least a c6 and sadly, there's one who failed. okay. let's move on. well, the girls on my right, received back their papers and they were ecstatic. mai, evelyn, daphne and yy all scored a distinction. congratulations to them. then it was the boy's turn. well, of course, everyone was excited and so far, azri, zihao, peter and derrick went well. happy faces. as we progress, it came my turn. i sat down there like an excited, innocent little child. however, well, you might already know, things don't turn up quite well. i was stunned by myself getting a b3 instead of an a1 or a2 at least, which i expected. upon hearing the news, i silently went back to my table, with my head down low. i was quite disappointed with myself and i was repeating 'where did i go wrong?' countlessly. then, tears well up and i covered my face downwards so nobody could see. xinmin and mai were the first two, i think, who came by me. i could here xinmin's voice slowly fading off as my body became surprisingly warm. at that point of time, i was lost in a world of uncertainty. soon later, more crowded around me, consoling and being there by my side. i could only sigh and cry at that moment. i was glad though that my light of my life was there for me, but then, it's about me. okay. i cried for around 15 mins(around there), and time for us to leave. jie was always there beside me. love her lots. came down to canteen, blurred and energiless. (no such word). kor asked me where i was going and asked me to go home with him so that he could look after me and i reach home safely. i didn't want to go home that early. so i stayed behind for a while. then azri, dek, yanyi and debra and gang came by. debra was like so funny, but i it didn't make me laugh. i didn't know why i was so stubborn after so many ppl consoling me not to think too much and all those. i'm just too depressed i think. azri talked to me for a moment. still i remained silent like a dead soul. then dek talked to me indirectly though but i shifted my body and turned the other side. haiz. then i left, decided to go for prayers. reached home and my mum was the first one to ask. i told her and well, she smiled and said to me i did my best. that was heng. immediately when to my room and slept throughout the afternoon. i didn't know crying for too long can be tiring and it can make you feverish. yea. i kinda have a fever right now. okay. i think that's all. there's an optional oral practice tomorrow. with my results, i don't feel like attending, but then i already wrote my name and that life has to go on. so see ya. for info, kor: malcom dek: howsun jie: rose |
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